It was just a dream November 9, 2009

I had a dream last night that as I looked out the window to our back yard, there was a gigantic mountain basically in our back yard. Unusual for Indiana. No mountains here. It was a terrible storm with rain pounding down and mud started sliding down the mountain. Not unusual for Indiana. Lots of bad rain storms here. After the rain started pouring, the mud started sliding down the mountain and pouring into our backyard. Next, huge trees started getting uprooted from the mudslide and carried away down the mountain, crashing into our back yard. Then, big pieces of what were formerly other homes started flying down and crashing down around us. Everything narrowly missing me and my family as we stood watching from my house.

I once had a dream journal that had little tidbits of dream interpretation. The one thing I remember about dream interpretation is that dreaming about a house represents your own soul and self.  In my dream, my house remained intact throughout all this turbulence meaning that my soul and myself stands strong amidst the storms I must endure. I don’t think my conscious self has as much confidence as my sub-conscious self.

This dream came after a discussion with our home teachers. I was asked to share my favorite scripture. This was a task for me since I have many favorite scriptures and often, it depends on my phase of life. I picked Matthew 11: 28-30.

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Maybe in my dream, my house wasn’t my house after all. Maybe my soul was taking a little shelter from the storm in His house.

The happy store October 22, 2009

Well hello there. I still have a birthday hangover. This year was a great one. Much love was sent and gladly received. I’ve become like a camel when it comes to happy times – storing it up so that when I have down days, I have a little something to fall back on.

Last week came a little wave of bad news for people I love. Sad things happen. Difficult trials must be faced. Life is seriously one tough road. So maybe since I’ve stored up a bunch of love lately, I can spare a little to give to my friends in need.

If I may be so bold, when you’ve got some love stored up – make sure to share it. You may just find that you’re stock of happy will be doubled as a result.

How different the day is remembered September 11, 2009

The above picture was taken last October during our trip to NYC. It was the first time I had returned to New York after September 11, 2001.  As I walked up to the site, I was overcome and couldn’t stop the tears. I remember vividly the morning of September 11th. My roommate called me from her cell phone on her way to work and told me to turn on the television and I watched as the buildings fell. We stayed glued to the television for hours and I don’t know if I fully understood the way this tragedy would affect me.  I had no personal loss on 9/11 but I always want to remember those who did lose their loved ones. And when I saw the site in person, I visualized all the lost lives and I always want to remember it because I feel like I need to remember it. I want to remember the bravery and the resiliency of all those the died and all those who survived.

Last year, I was visiting in Utah on September 11th. That night, I sat with my best friend, Lisa, in her apartment. She was expecting twins – a boy and a girl. I was expecting too. We talked about how wonderful it was that we were both pregnant and how fun it was to be pregnant at the same time.  Later that night, I began to miscarry. That night and the days that followed were some of the saddest days of my life. I then truly understood the loss of miscarriage. It’s changed me forever.

Today, I found out that my dear friend from college had amazing news. Her husband received a new heart.  She reflected on the truth that “miracles happen”. And I believe it. Through adversity, comes strength. So as I go about my day, I will remember loss. I will remember strength and I will remember hope.

The extra hour August 3, 2009

Living in Prague as a missionary was a dream.  It was emotionally and physically difficult but at the same time it was a dream.  Although others may argue, I believe that Prague is the most beautiful city in Europe.  And for six months, I was able to live and work there.  Granted, most of my work took place away from the center of the city where the most breathtaking sights were held, but the feeling that Prague brings -the beauty it brings to your soul- does not leave you.

One Sunday morning, my missionary companion and I rushed to the tram stop an hour before church began so that we could make the trek to our meeting house. Sundays were slow transportation days and if you didn’t catch the first tram, there was no hope of being on time.  We climbed on the first in a series of trams we would take to reach our destination.  As we plopped down in the empty car, I looked through my hazy eyes to see that the clock was an hour early.  No, we were an hour early.  We did not remember to change our clocks.  We somehow forgot that we could have had an extra hour of sleep which was very precious to the over-tired missionary.

We seemed to be of one mind when we discovered we had that extra hour.  Almost without any discussion, we stepped off the tram near Charles Bridge and took an hour-long walk through the city to our church building.  It was early in the morning, before any tourists were out and before any club mixes blared from stores.  As an added bonus, it was Sunday where most people were either sleeping in or hung over.  Times like this were rare in such a noisy metropolis.  The beauty of the city was only magnified by the calm that blanketed our surroundings. We walked across the bridge and the Vltava river.  We walked through Mala Strana and up to Prague Castle.  From there, we walked to our building.  We reached the same destination. The difference that Sunday morning was that we used the extra hour to walk and absorb our surroundings,  traveling on foot rather than sitting on a tram watching everything from the window.

Life doesn’t always work out on our timeline. We are anxious and we are impatient.  We are planners.  We are scheduled.  But sometimes, we are given an extra hour. An hour that isn’t missing, it’s a bonus.  So as I’ve grown ever-impatient in my life, I remember my extra hour in Prague and am reminded that the destination was the same, but I was all the happier for having walked a mile in a magical city.